The path to Tranquility (summer)
96. True happiness comes from loving each other
Perhaps we all yearn for happiness, but happiness is different from joy, it
requires some specific conditions to arise. First, happiness cannot exist
without others. By sharing joy with others, we gain more joy, and happiness
is the result of deeply shared joy. This means that in order to gain
happiness, we must create joy for ourselves. However, we may experience joy
when we are in pain or fear, but we cannot experience happiness. It can be
seen that happiness comes from joy and transcends joy. There are three
levels of joy, each with a different duration, but all come from our sense
of being. We can think of happiness as a state of overflowing sense of
being.
The lowest level is the joy that comes from instinct. When the needs of the body are met, and death is temporarily overcome, we feel joy, which is the least lasting kind of joy. The higher level is the joy that comes from the ego. We feel this joy whenever we can devote ourselves to something and forget about time and death. Joy from the ego lasts longer because the ego is more protective of life than instinct. The highest level is the joy that comes from consciousness. When we cooperate with others to do something meaningful, we experience lasting joy. Consciousness is the most powerful force to protect life, so when we feel that we are full of consciousness, we will have a sufficient sense of being and security, and gain great joy. When we realize that what we are doing is consistent with the meaning of life, that is, when we feel that we have realized the value of life, our life will be filled with joy.
However, joy is just the seed of happiness. These three levels of joy represent the three stages of germination, growth and flowering of happiness. The joy we get in the first and second stages is superficial and short-lived, because we create and enjoy these joys alone, because we create and enjoy it alone and quickly consume it. In the third stage, we realize the importance of others and let others participate in the process of creating joy. At this stage, we have allowed joy to blossom, but whether it can bear the fruit of happiness depends on our ability to connect deeply with others.
Deep connection is mutual love. The reason why it makes people happy is that through this kind of connection, joy can be deeply shared, making it easier for us to obtain joy and at a lower cost. At this time, joy can continue to sprout, grow, bloom and bear fruit, entering a virtuous cycle. Not only can we create joy on our own, but we can also receive joy passed on by others. Therefore, our joy from quantitative change to qualitative change, and ultimately turns into happiness. This means that joy is just a short-term positive mood fluctuation, while happiness is a sustained and stable positive mood, which is a kind of tranquility.
Joy comes when some of our needs are met, and happiness comes when all of our needs are met and we no longer have to worry about poverty. Everything that makes life better is what we really need. There are some things we cannot give ourselves and therefore need others. We need family affection when we are young, and we need friendship and love even more when we grow up. Without others, our joy itself is incomplete and cannot be transformed into happiness. This does not mean that we should rely on others to give us joy, but it means that we should know how to give to others.
Mutual relying will only reduce joy and increase each other's burdens. Mutual giving will keep the joy flowing and make each other relaxed and comfortable. When we can share everything with others, we maximize joy and enhance its quality. Therefore, to obtain happiness, we should change from relying on others to relying on ourselves, and from takers to givers. We start by actively giving to ourselves, develop into actively giving to others, and then establish a mutually giving relationship with others. This transformation is the cultivation of our ability to love each other.
In a relationship, if we are all waiting for the other to bring surprises, there is little chance of joy. Even if we can get it occasionally, it will not have a good effect, because anxiety is generated in the waiting process, a lot of energy is consumed, and fatigue offsets joy. However, if we both regularly create joy for ourselves and then share it with each other, such as by sharing the joy of eating delicious food, reading a book, or learning something new, then we will feel joy more often. Over time, happiness will arise in our hearts. It's like two people sharing a house, each person actually has access to not just half of the house, but the entire house. This house is magnified by our hearts.
Love is willingly giving others what they need, which is traditionally called gentleness and consideration. When the energy of life is transformed into the ability to give, we will first treat ourselves gently, understand our needs, and then considerately give to ourselves. Being able to give to ourselves, we can get rid of relying on others, and also learn how to give to others. The ultimate goal of love is to let us deeply understand life, meet the needs of life, thereby overcoming fear and feeling true happiness.
Love is a force that allows us to transcend instinct and habits. There is no love in human instinct, which means we cannot rely on instinct to get happiness. Although we are nurtured by our parents and cared for by society, we rarely feel true love while growing up, but we are accustomed to rely and control. Therefore, we need to obey the power of love and let the joy of loving each other stay in our hearts for a long time, and aggregate into happiness.
In the realm of mutual love, we create joy from liking and resonance, and achieve spiritual fusion from sharing joy. We will free ourselves from the constraints of instinct and habit, allowing ego to fade and consciousness to grow. Because we love each other, we are more aware of our choices and actions, see each other's needs more clearly, and deeply appreciate the value of life. Therefore, we believe in the power of life and are full of hope for the future. At this time, happiness will penetrate into our hearts until the end of life.
95. Only by stepping out of loneliness can we find tranquility and love
97. Don't forget to utilize logical thinking
