The path to Tranquility (spring)
54. Removing the mask leads to beautiful relationships
Establishing relationships with others is a very important thing in our lives.
However, relationships in reality often differ greatly from what we imagine.
We frequently wear masks to conceal our true thoughts and emotions, which may
provide some sense of security but also hinder us from forming truly
meaningful relationships.
When we wear masks, we cannot show our true selves. From the moment we choose a partner, we do not choose based on our true needs. Even if it is a relationship that we actively choose, if our consciousness is not present and our hearts are full of contradictions, anxiety and fear, then the person who actually enters the relationship will only be a social role player, not our true self.
We also worry about being discovered by others for our true inner self, so we pretend to be what others want us to be, or hide our needs. This only makes us feel more lonely and nervous. Without showing our true selves, we cannot establish good and stable relationships.
In fact, We need very much to connect with others, but we don't just have one mask, we have many, such as different personalities, perceptions, preferences, identities, and beliefs. If there is not only one person in our inner world, but a group of people, with various habits and prejudices, playing multiple different roles, it will make it difficult for others to know how to interact with us.
This group of people are our egos. These egos alternate, just like we wear different masks at different times, so we cannot establish genuine relationships. It is also for these reasons that we always find it difficult to communicate deeply in relationships, retreat at the slightest setback, and conflict with different opinions. Such superficial relationships cannot satisfy us, so we are caught in a dilemma and experience a lot of anxiety.
Superficial relationships cannot be loved relationships, even if it can relieve boredom and external loneliness, it will certainly not be able to relieve inner loneliness. Wearing masks and acting in relationships, those smiles are not our real smiles, but the masks are smiling. Even if we realize that we need to remove the mask, we may worry that others will not adapt. These falsehoods and worries are a high wall between us, preventing us from intimacy.
To establish deep connections, we must remove egos and take off the mask. Only then can we attract those who truly appreciate and accept us, establish relationships based on sincerity and reliance, and make us feel safe and empowered. Caring for and understanding each other, giving each other what is needed, these elements of love can only be effective in a genuine relationship. Therefore, we must connect to others with true awareness, to obtain satisfactory results.
To remove the mask, we need to step into our inner selves. The more conscious we are of going inward, the more we can integrate into relationships. Because we will discover the burden in our hearts, the reasons for the stagnation of relationships, and understand the key factors for establishing happy relationships, and then remove obstacles. One more point is crucial: by removing the mask, we can understand our true needs and avoid establishing unhelpful relationships.
53. Consciously enter the inner world
55. Continuously accepting new things
