The path to Tranquility (spring)
44. Get rid of the desire for excellence
We are taught from a young age to pursue excellence, to become the best
version of ourselves, and to achieve success in academics, career, and life.
However, the desire for excellence not only hinders our ability to become
excellent, but also has negative effects on our mental health, and can even
prevent us from feeling happiness.
When we associate our self-worth with excellence, we feel pressure and anxiety. If we feel like we can never meet expectations, it leads to self-doubt and frustration. We will be very sensitive to other people's evaluations and care too much about other people's opinions, which affects our relationships with others. We also become too focused on outcomes, and miss opportunities to learn from the process. The most serious problem is causing physical and mental division and causing mental illness.
The key to getting rid of the desire for excellence is to accept ourselves, and believe that everything is for the best. We need this belief: I am who I am, nature wants me to be like this, otherwise there is no need for me in the world. If we are dissatisfied with our current life, we must have this belief. If we are satisfied, then we should have this belief even more.
Accepting ourselves, allows us to separate our tool value from our intrinsic value. We can be useful to society or others, which is our tool value, but we only need to be useful to ourselves, which is our intrinsic value and the true source of our sense of worth. When we understand our true worth, we can focus on self-growth rather than tying our worth to the opinions of others. If we harm our own lives in order to cater to others, not only will we be of no value to ourselves, but our tool value will also be greatly diminished.
Therefore, we don't need to try to change the outer of ourselves, but just need to accept ourselves as we are. When we deeply accept ourselves, there is no conflict in our hearts, and negative emotions cannot arise. When we feel joy often, we will like ourselves more and not force ourselves to become excellent.
Getting rid of the desire for excellence removes the ego that is clouded by consciousness. With a more sensitive and detailed observation of the outside world, our consciousness and reason will function more smoothly. Then, when dealing with changes in the outside world, we will appear calm and elegant, and others will naturally give us good evaluations.
The foundation of excellence is the ability to observe the world and creativity. When we understand our true needs and create a happy life for ourselves, we achieve true excellence. This is a natural development process, which not only cannot be forced, but will also be hindered by various personalities. Therefore, accepting everything, cultivating consciousness, letting go of habits and desires, and allowing ourselves to be free and ease, is the best way to become excellent.
