The path to Tranquility (spring)
44. True excellence begins with self-acceptance
We are taught from a young age to strive for excellence, to be the best, to excel in our studies, careers, or lives. However, this mindset often fails to help us achieve true excellence. Instead, it harms our mental health and weakens our ability to experience joy and fulfillment. When we associate our self-worth with excellence, stress, anxiety, and self-doubt often follow. When we fail to meet internal or external expectations, we can easily fall into depression and even question the meaning of our existence.
Imagine a student who, in pursuit of academic excellence, sacrifices sleep, hobbies, and even resorts to cheating. While this may get him high grades in the short term, it will also deprive him of the joy of learning and miss the opportunity to develop other abilities. Over time, he may become bored with learning, even doubt his own worth, and ultimately fail to achieve real success. Clearly, when excellence becomes a source of pressure, it loses its original meaning.
True excellence is not a goal but a natural outcome. When we focus on inner growth and exploration, excellence emerges naturally, just as a tree bears fruit with the help of sunlight and nutrients. This inner maturity is the source of conscious strength—only by understanding our needs and knowing how to meet them can we demonstrate resilience and creativity in the face of challenges.
To break free from the obsession with excellence, we must first learn to accept ourselves and firmly believe that we are good enough right now. This isn't self-indulgence, but rather a profound realization: I'm born into this world, with a unique life, and this in itself is the embodiment of the meaning of existence. Regardless of whether my current life meets my own expectations or those of others, accepting myself is the starting point for building a healthy self-awareness and the cornerstone of true growth.
Self-acceptance can also help us distinguish between intrinsic value and instrumental value. Instrumental value often derives from external evaluations such as performance, status, and income, tending to rely on the approval of others while neglecting one's own needs. Intrinsic value, on the other hand, is based on personal beliefs, passion, and self-identity, which can build a stable self and enhance happiness and creativity. For example, if an artist creates solely for market reasons, they may lose their original purpose and even feel empty. However, when artists prioritize the intrinsic value of their work, creation becomes a process of self-realization.
In his youth, Albert Einstein was not considered a genius, and was even considered a slow learner. Yet, despite his obsessive pursuit of excellence, he persevered, driven by his love of knowledge, and ultimately became a giant in the history of science. Similarly, a writer initially writes not for fame or fortune, but to express and share. With each creation, he reflects and refines, gradually improving his skills and insights. Over time, his work naturally garnered acclaim and reached a level of excellence. These examples remind us that true excellence is a byproduct of continuous growth, not a self-imposed goal.
When we let go of our obsession with perfection, our minds are freed, allowing us to perceive the world more acutely. For example, if a photographer stopped obsessing over technical perfection and focused instead on capturing the emotion and light of the moment, they might create work with greater depth and soul. This calmness and insight are the foundation of excellence.
We can take concrete steps to help cultivate self-acceptance and inner growth. For example, we can keep track of new skills we've learned or obstacles we've overcome, recognizing our efforts. We can break down our grand dreams into small steps, focusing on the process rather than the outcome. We can learn to process our emotions, avoid excessive self-blame, and reflect on what brings us fulfillment. We can also set aside time each day to talk to ourselves and practice looking at our imperfections with a gentle eye.
Excessive pursuit of excellence can become a shackle on our growth; accepting the status quo and focusing on growth is the natural path to true excellence. True excellence begins with self-acceptance. When we let go of our obsession with results and prioritize growth and joy in our lives, excellence will quietly blossom like a flower—not as a result of others' judgment, but as a manifestation of our own freedom and happiness.
43. Love is a philosophical poem that contemplates existence
