The path to Tranquility (spring)
20. Taking off the shell of the soul
During the process of growing up, we often build and maintain a shell on
our souls. This shell is a mask to hide the true appearance of our souls and
avoid getting hurt. This can leave us feeling exhausted and alone because we
are unable to connect deeply with others. We need to cooperate with others,
but we always want to keep our distance from others because we are worried
that if we get too close to each other, our masks will be torn off by others.
We want to maintain a perfect image, so we are always afraid to get close to
others, but we also expect their understanding and help.
In fact, one of the reasons for the fear of being seen through by others is the fear of being abandoned by others. But we don’t want to leave others, so we are very conflicted inside. This ambivalence causes us to have a lot of anxiety in our intimate relationships. Another reason is the fear of being discovered for our weaknesses, which gives others an opportunity to attack us. These fears create conflicts, and conflicts bring new anxieties, which in turn trigger even greater fears. This vicious cycle can also lead to mental illness.
However, others may be in the same situation. When two people are like this, understanding each other becomes a luxury. Keeping a distance involves a fear: if the mask is removed, the relationship will end. We all like to imagine the unknown, which is also one of the reasons we are attracted to each other. But when we see each other's true minds, not only will we stop imagining, but we will also know that there is a big gap between imagination and reality.
Only by overcoming fear and bravely opening up to others can we reduce their imagination and misunderstanding. Allowing others to face the real us helps build stable relationships. Only in this way can each other achieve true understanding. By opening ourselves up, we don’t have to worry about others getting tired of us, because we allow others to get to know the real us and then build a relationship with us. Moreover, our soul is not a solid object, it contains not only many unknown things, but also constantly updates, enough for others to explore throughout their lives.
To explore the soul, fusion is the most effective way, and the shell of the soul is an obstacle. When two souls get close, take off the shell made up of the ego, and merge together, the distance will disappear. We are mirrors to each other, reflecting both you and me at the same time, having you in me, and having me in you. This is not a "you and me" relationship, but a "we" state. This is an ideal realm that many people long for and seek.
Taking off the shell of the soul is not as easy as taking off clothes. This requires us to first face our weaknesses, be willing to accept criticism and suggestions from others, focus on each moment, and allow ourselves to have sufficient consciousness. In this way, we will not lose anything, but will gain a truly powerful self.
21. Our souls are all the same
